The Surprise We Found Recorded on Our Ring Camera

They’re Heeeere…

A crappy house is a pretty good crime deterrent. I think the bad guys must figure that a crappy house probably contains crappy stuff, so they don’t even bother. (Low return on crime investment, I guess.) But our house is looking less and less crappy these days, and the less crappy our house looks, the more security becomes a concern.

The surprise we found recorded on our ring camera

With that in mind, Schmoopy bought one of those Ring Floodlight Cameras to mount on the garage. We love it. Not only is the motion light very convenient, but knowing we’ll have video of the bad guys when they rob us is strangely comforting.

So far, we haven’t recorded any criminal activity, but we were surprised by what we found was going on in the wee hours. We had no idea…

No, silly. We don’t have ghosts. (At least, none that we know about…) That would’ve made for a great Halloween post though, right? Missed opportunity.


Hey, here’s something Halloweenie for you…

My Crappy Spider

A giant spider! But that’s not the surprise we found out about. Of course we have giant spiders. Everyone has giant spiders. (It’s true.)

So, WTF did we see on our new camera in the wee hours? Before I tell you, let me quickly share my new morning ritual with you.

(Yes, I know I’m very annoying. I promise I’m gonna tell you right after this next part.)

Every weekday, I wake up around 10 a.m. (I know, right? I’m a Princess…) to a notification on the Ring app telling me the camera has detected motion at around 8:30 a.m. I then watch a video of Schmoo leaving for work. Please enjoy this video montage I made to share with you. (You can click here if you don’t see it below…)

I love his little goodbye videos. Especially since they don’t disturb my sleep the way a goodbye kiss does. (Guys, I really don’t like to wake up before 10. Even for a kiss from the love of my life. Sleep also happens to be the love of my life. It’s OK. They know about each other. I can love two things.)

In case you’re wondering, that last clip was recorded only a week ago. My honey tore a tendon whilst trying to help a damsel in distress. (That’ll teach him to help other damsels.) Our new shed will have to wait until the spring. Oh, darn. I just hate putting off the big projects. You guys know how motivated I am. Big projects are my most favorite. (Ha, no, not really, dummy.)

OK, so, WTF is the freaking surprise, already!?! Well, we don’t have ghosts and we don’t have criminals, but what we do have are a couple of stealthy feline trespassers…

Guys, cats! You love cats! Who doesn’t love cats? Only people who are dead inside. Dead. Like the ghosts that we do not have. (That we know of.)

Best we can tell, there are two of them. They’re obviously little bad asses, surviving near such a busy road. I’m not sure why they picked our crappy yard to loiter in, but now that I know they’re out there, I can’t not be concerned. Winter is coming and, while I can’t take them inside (assuming they would even want to come in), I can’t leave them outside without a proper shelter from the cold.

There are a lot of plans on the interwebs for building feral cat shelters. I like elements of many of them, but I didn’t find a single plan that felt right, so I decided to design and build my own.

(Since, it’s Halloween, I have for you a trick and also a treat.)

My Cat Egor on Halloween

I’ll be telling you all about the cat shelter in a future post. (That’s the trick.) Yeah, I know. I suck. But I’m still working on it, so you just have to be patient. Make sure you subscribe below so you don’t miss it.

For the treat (hopefully you’ll think it’s a treat), I recently recorded a podcast with Doug over at You can listen to it here. It’s about 30 minutes of me and Doug (but mostly me) chatting about My Crappy House. Tell me in the comments below if you think I have a New York accent. (I try very hard not to, but remember, My Crappy House is on Lawn Guyland in New Yawk. I’m at a disadvantage…)

***Time travel links! Just when you thought you’d have to wait to see how my cat shelter turned out… well, you don’t! There are three more posts in this series and you’re going to want to read them all. Trust me. Part I is where I discuss the plan, Part II is where I show you exactly how I built it, and Part III (my favorite part) is where I show you just how crazy a person can be when designing a house for cats to live in.

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  • Lisa Garber

    Haven’t listened to the podcast (Don’t be offended, I’ve never listened to any podcasts. Don’t know why, I love radio and it’s almost the same thing except I don’t listen to political radio shows and I don’t think you do those. At least I hope you don’t, I would like you a whole lot less and somehow I just KNOW that is important to you. I should have put ending parentheses in here somewhere. Oh, well. My dogs would like to chase your cat squatters but Longuh Eyelan is a bit far. Carry on.

    • My Crappy House

      Of course, I’m not offended. It takes a lot to offend me. I also have less than ZERO interest in talking about politics! So, if you ever do decide to listen, know that it’s a safe space

  • Joan

    Loved the Schmoopy video! You found a good guy! My cameras have spotted plenty of wildlife. Mostly raccoons, possums, deer, my neighbor’s cat (who’s also my little buddy) and a fox. As for the podcast, I hear a tinge of that accent. Reminds me of Baby from Dirty Dancing!

    • My Crappy House

      Ha nobody puts me in the corner.

      We also found out we have a raccoon. Where does all the wildlife hide during the day??

  • Margaret A. Johnson

    Loved the Podcast. You did a fantastic job. Love your writing as always, funny, quirky, informative and just all around great. Keep up the good work. I’m always rooting for you!!!

  • Katherine Davies

    You’ve got a keeper there. Looking forward to the podcast. It’s impossible to tell from previous photos of your formerly crappy house that your road is not just a little lane.

    • My Crappy House

      Yeah, he’s a good one

      So, up until this video, I’d made a conscious effort to keep the street hidden. I’m not sure why. Nowadays, people can find out anything they want to know on the internet. It’s not like I’m famous. No one cares where I live. So, yeah. We live on a REALLY busy road!

  • em

    The Schmoop video is pretty heartwarming…if it isn’t already on FB (or any of those other things), you should get it there… I can see it likely going viral, bringing you the wordwide blog audience you deserve (despite your NY accent or lack thereof).

    Our front porch cam has been capturing a visiting fox and a likely racoon trio who seem to enjoy strutting around for us, though not with the same ardor as Schmoop, who will likely become famous for his sweet moves. That he lets you sleep already made him a keeper. But those goodbyes….dang, you’re a lucky chick.

    • My Crappy House

      I am so lucky. We have the best life And now we have two cats in the yard! Life used to be so hard…

      I’m trying to put the video on Facebook, but they’re such a pain. I’ve now tried twice and nothing gets posted. I’ll wait a couple of hours and try again if it doesn’t show up by then. Freaking FB!

  • Mar

    I loved your video. So sweet!

    Thank you so much for building a shelter for the two cats. You may want to investigate if your town has a low-cost spay/neuter program for feral cats. You could trap the cats, get them neutered, and return them to your property and continue to feed them. They then can have a good life on your property. Thank you and I really enjoy your posts and especially your witty sense of humor. Take care.

    • My Crappy House

      Aww, we love the animals! We’re happy to give them a warm place to sleep. I’ll check and see if our town has a program like the one you suggest. That’s a good idea.

  • SusieQ

    I love your humor & your blog! Couldn’t be happier that you found such a great guy! And we are cat parents ourselves (I mean they’re MUCH cheaper to raise than real kids, right?!?) so that makes you even more likeable! Can’t wait to see the cat house you’re working on!

    • My Crappy House

      Oh, we much prefer fur babies to the human kind. They’re cheaper, more appreciative, never complain, and I’d MUCH rather clean a litter box than a diaper!

  • Denise

    Thanks for sharing the great Schmoopy video. I’m guessing you two keep each other very well entertained! No details please. I mean that in a very general way. ? Also thanks for looking out for the kitties. They will appreciate it. ?

    • My Crappy House

      Haha yes. Generally speaking, in a vague, detail-less sort of way, we do keep each other quite entertained.

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