countermeasure definitions You may be surprised to find out this post utilizes both definitions. (dun dun DUN…)

But before we get to all of that, here’s where I left you

Pre counter pic

My disappointingly unfinished kitchen. With the cabinets in place, it was time to pick out a counter top. Since it’s taken me five loooong years to get this far, I had plenty of time to shop around and I already knew exactly what I wanted so I was able to order my counters immediately.

Yeah, right.

It’s like you don’t you know me at all. I had no freaking idea what counter I wanted. I had to take another trip to Crazy Town

Counter Choices

I knew I wanted something light because my cabinets are on the medium to dark side, but I didn’t want something busy. I looked at granite, quartz, and marble. I called my family in for emergency meetings on location to help me narrow the field. I polled random strangers on the street. I traveled extensively with my door sample, hunting exotic counters in the wild. I kept a dream journal in case my subconscious had any insight. (It did not.) I viewed samples under every conceivable light source, both natural and artificial, outside and inside, at different times of day in varying weather conditions (Because, you know, that affects the quality and color of the light. Duh…). And, finally, with the help of my friends, family, counter store employees, the UPS guy, my congressman, and the Magic 8 Ball, finally, I had my choice.

And then I changed my mind and picked this one:


…which, if you read this post, is not new information. That’s Berwyn from Cambria Quartz.

So… that was a whole lot of reading for you to end up learning nothing. Except how mental I am. Sorry to put you through all that. Don’t be mad. Let’s talk about how this guy almost burned my house down:

Counter measure 1

That’s the countermeasure guy. He tried to destroy all I have poured my heart and soul into these last 5 years. OK, well, not on purpose. Probably. He actually seemed to be doing a pretty good job up until the near tragedy. This looks precise:

Counter measure 2

Because I was concerned with my brand new stove getting scratched in my unfinished kitchen while potentially careless workers did their jobs, I had a piece of cardboard on the glass to protect it. When counter guy went to measure by the stove, he inadvertently leaned on a knob and turned on a burner. The hottest burner. The “Ultra Heat” burner. My protective cardboard was then repurposed for kindling.


So, first there was smoke. And then, sooner than you would think, there were flames! Then there was screaming. (Him, not me.) (Yeah, okay. Me too.) And then… the countermeasure guy took countermeasures! He grabbed the flaming cardboard, ran past my brand new velvet sofa (!!!!!!), and out the front door. This all happened in about 10 seconds.

Luckily, there were no casualties. Except my brand new stove.

Burnt stove cropped

But, miraculously, that all came off with a lot of scrubbing. So, while there are no physical reminders of this near disaster, I will never forget how close I came to losing everything. Fire is no joke. Don’t play with matches, kids. Probably shouldn’t use the stove either. Just to be on the safe side. (Easier to keep clean that way too, so win/win.)


About a week later, they came to do the install. Quartz is super heavy, just like granite. Installation looked very unpleasant, so I just stayed out of the way, snapping pictures at them like an annoying paparazza. (Paparazzi is plural. I’m not wrong.) I’m sure they were flattered by the attention.

Counter Install 2

Counter Install 3

My pictures suck. I wouldn’t make a very good paparazza.

I only have two after pictures for you. And they’re not very good either.

Finished counter 2

Finished counter 1

My next kitchen post is going to have all of the good pictures (the ones I take with my real camera instead of my phone), but before that, you’re going to get at least one dining room post. Stuff is happening in there. And it’s really good stuff, I tell you. I promise I’ll have that for you by June, the latest.



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  • Lisa

    1. We know (and love) how mental you are!
    2. Fire is definitely no joke.
    3. Damn, those counters look heavy!
    4. Yes, I’m sure they were flattered.
    5. Can’t wait to make mac and cheese in there!

    • My Crappy House

      I would love for you to make mac and cheese in there, but I’m never turning on the stove again. It’s for show now.

  • Phoebe

    So I was reading about your countertop decision. And I thought boy, she’s mental. And then I thought of my own kitchen that is waiting for a backsplash for a year because I don’t know what I want. Even though I have already bought tiles that match perfectly… (Still, does the fact that I’M crazy means you are NOT crazy? Hmmm… Think I’ll say nobody is crazy. Objectively speaking, ofc). But what was your choice you didn’t choose? You didn’t tell us.
    Also, how can you commit to something without checking out the competition? You can’t. So again, nobody is crazy. Just considering all options carefully. You could even call such a person wise, right? Not crazy.
    Also, when you are taking photos looking at the windows, try forcing the camera to use flash.
    Also, my own brand new stove had a similar accident – no fire, but molten plastic that never quite came completely off. I think it’s a curse.
    That is all. (I’m normally more normal, honest.) Can’t wait to see completely finished pics. Maybe even with backsplash? (sigh)

    • My Crappy House

      Don’t even get me started on backsplashes… That’s another post. (And another trip to Crazy Town.) As for this trip, the one I almost chose was called Safari, by Pental Quartz. (I linked it there for you.) I chose it based on a small sample though. Once I found a larger sample, it wasn’t so special. The one I did choose (Berwyn) looked amazing on a vanity I saw in one of the many tile places I went to. So, yeah. I guess, since I’m super happy with my choice, I can say that it was all worth it. I’m hoping I’m equally happy with the backsplash I chose. I haven’t installed that yet. Waiting for a warm day to use the wet saw. But yes, my next kitchen post will have the backsplash in it. (I think… lol)

    • Phoebe

      Hello again! Today I finally found the backsplash I’ve been secretly wanting (see, everything else I saw just wasn’t IT). And it’s not my fault I didn’t find it earlier, because it’s a new design! So by the end of summer I will have a backsplash. Will you have a post?

    • My Crappy House

      Hi there! I’ve been having the busiest (and best!) year ever. It’s caused me to be woefully neglectful of my poor blog. Yes, I will have a post by the end up the summer! Hopefully, sooner than that. I totally feel you on the backsplash hunt. What did you end up choosing? I still haven’t installed mine yet. Now I’m waiting for cooler weather. That, and my pendant lighting are the last two things I need to finish in my kitchen. Then it will be DONE! I hope you’re enjoying your summer as I am

  • Terrie

    I always look forward to reading your posts. Then I don’t feel like I am the only person in the world who cannot make up her mind. My den has been on hold for two months while I try to decide on lights for the niche that holds the desk. “Why is it taking you so long to figure out the light problem?” If I knew it wouldn’t be a problem!!! So reading your post today first, made me laugh like an idiot and second, gave me a little vindication on my indecision. For that, I thank you. And I adore your countertops. Heck, I adore your whole kitchen. What a beauty. It looks amazing. Congrats!

    • My Crappy House

      Only two months? That’s nothing. Two months is speedy decision making in my book. Sometimes it takes time to find “the one”. That’s what I hear, anyway… Thank you so much for the compliment

  • terri

    The same kind of thing happened to me with the burner when a handyman was taking down my upper cabinets over the stove. I covered the “NEW” stove with a king size quilt to prevent any mishaps and sure enough he turned on the burner, the cabinet fell on top of the stove so that took a huge effort to get the large cabinet off of the smoking quilt. Eventually he ran out of the house with the quilt and tossed it on the lawn. I was feverishly trying to scrub the damage off of my new glass stovetop (it did eventually come off). In the meantime we noticed that the quilt started flaming in the yard. He dragged the hose over and doused the flames. What a nightmare, but it all ended fairly well, minus a nice quilt.

    • My Crappy House

      lol your lesson sounds just like mine! Actually, WORSE with the falling cabinet. So, what did we learn? Turn that stove breaker off! I removed the knobs on my stove too, just in case. I’m glad both our stoves came out unscathed and our houses didn’t burn to the ground. Sorry about your quilt, though. RIP

  • Jill

    What an exciting post! Fire! Screaming! A man running with a piece of flaming cardboard past your beautiful new sofa! Whew!
    What kind of stove did you get?

    • My Crappy House

      Right?? So much DRAMA! I think this is my model. LG4411ST I’m kind of regretting those front knobs. I thought it looked more like a gas stove that way, but it turns out they’re much to easy to accidentally turn on. I was also roped in with that electric blue color inside the ovens. Not like I ever really see it. I guess I just like knowing it’s there. I’m such an easy target…

  • Trollopian

    Now I don’t feel so bad about taking five years to decide on a new kitchen light fixture. (It involved many tradeoffs…it’s an old condo, with only one ceiling box; and long story short, the vintage schoolroom-style lights that I’d prefer wouldn’t provide enough illumination.)

    Your counters look terrific, your story is dramatic and has a happy ending plus useful life lessons, and the only thing missing from this post is Egor!

    • My Crappy House

      Oh, I love those schoolroom lights – I actually bought those for my kitchen, but the down rods were too long for me. That was light fixture number 3. I’m on to light fixture number 4 right now, but that one might not work either. You are not alone!

      Egor is not allowed on my counters, but he’s having trouble getting the message. That’s why I had to exclude him from this post. He needs to learn his lesson. No more kitty fame for him until he listens to mommy…

    • Trollopian

      Hey “Crappy” and Egor,

      I’m still dithering, but now lean towards this schoolhouse-type fixture: (also available in other diameters and finishes, e.g., nickel). It has the merit of accommodating two bulbs, which is rare in schoolhouse fixtures; and the chain makes the height adjustable. So, thought I’d pass it on!

    • My Crappy House

      That’s a nice find! I’m thinking clear glass or mercury glass for me, but I do like this one. Thanks for sharing!

    • My Crappy House

      lol noooooo! My house still totally looks crappy from the outside, so I can keep the name for at least a little while longer…

  • Carole Strom

    Your kitchen is……………..GORGEOUS!!
    Well worth the time and effort! I think it just might be calling your name…”come bake a cake in my oven” … “come spread freshly baked cookies in my shiny, Spacious counter”…”let’s have a kitchen warming ( no pun intended)! So happy for you and Egor!

    • My Crappy House

      Thank you! I haven’t cooked much in it, but I love looking at it. I think it knows I don’t know wtf I’m doing and it’s calling to my friends who like to cook.

  • Sherrie Freebird

    I’ve got you all beat. I’ve been sleeping on the couch for almost four years trying to decide what color to paint the walls in my bedroom. I don’t want to move the furniture back in until it’s painted! I guess I’m the mayor of crazy town.

    • My Crappy House

      lol you are SO the Mayor of Crazy Town! Thanks for letting me visit from time to time…

  • Cecile

    My kitchen flooring has been acclimating for over 4 years now under the large table. It may actually get onto the floor this summer. I almost have my oldest son talked into helping me. I am 67 and my knees are 104!

    • My Crappy House

      Aww yeah, that job is tough on the knees. Get a good pair of knee pads. Or maybe supervise your son as he does it

  • Desiree

    The kitchen looks gorgeous! I check in on you from time to time and was so pleasantly surprised to see cabinets! Look at you go! And the countertops are gorgeous! I’m off to get caught up now; keep up the good work!

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