Magically Floating Shelves

What Sorcery is This?

Having been well established in My Crappy House for many years, surrounded by all of my many crappy possessions, you would think that it would have been a challenge making room for Schmoo when he moved in with me. It wasn’t. Lucky for me, he wasn’t attached to much of his stuff. Just his clothes, tools, a few manscaping products, some books, and a handful of treasures.

This post is about the treasures.

We had only been dating for two months, eating takeout Chinese food, when Schmoopy cracked his cookie and got this fortune…

As the “L” word had yet to be dropped, it made him visibly uncomfortable and he quickly threw it away without showing me. He blamed his sudden sweating on the Kung Pao.


Of course, I fished it out of the garbage bag and I saved it. Such an unusual fortune was surely a sign… Three weeks later, post “L” word, I gave it back to him in a frame for his apartment so he would always remember how a Chinese cookie blew up his spot. (See? It was a sign.)

I know. We’re so freaking cute, right?

Nine months later we moved in together and I had to live with a boy.

It’s been surprisingly easy, actually. We get along really well. We’ve literally only had one fight in three years.

It was about the dryer vent.

I won.

Anyway, between the two of us, we had a nice little collection of treasures that needed a place to be appreciated. We decided the brick wall would make a nice backdrop for a couple of magically floating shelves. (I know, right? How do they do that?? Where are the brackets! What sorcery is this?!)

The exact ones we have are discontinued, but these look super similar and they have even better reviews than the shelves we have. (I’m supposed to tell you that’s an affiliate link, even though it doesn’t cost you anything more if you buy the shelves by clicking it. I just get a little commission for the referral. What a litigious world…)

Installation wasn’t complicated but, there is sheet metal behind my brick (you remember), so I had to really lean into the drill to get through that layer. My cordless drill wasn’t up for it, so I had to use my corded Dewalt for some extra power.

My, what a flattering photograph.

Drilling the holes was the hardest part. The magically hidden brackets look like this:

Then the shelves just slide onto those pegs and suddenly appear to defy gravity! Truly a-MA-zing! Hey, do you think David Blaine knows about magically floating shelves and feels inspired? I do. Guys, it’s like they levitate!

So, that’s it. Logic defying, mind-boggling, magically-suspended, anti-gravitational, wtf!-are-my-eyes-deceiving me, floating shelves. Wow. Just… wow. Am I right?

And these are our treasures. His, mine and ours.

The glass thing is a barometer, but I don’t think it does what it’s supposed to do. It still looks cool anyway and it was a Christmas gift.

We got the skull from a renaissance faire and the peacock tile is from The Martin House in Buffalo, NY, designed by Frank Lloyd Wright.

I’m linking the octopus for you, but you’re going to think I’m crazy for spending as much as I did. I will say it’s made very well and I love it, so I’m not sorry.

I bought the fortune frame locally in a discount store. I really tried to find something similar on Amazon, but this is the best I could do. It’s just as floaty, but more modern.

(The plants are not treasures. They are fake. Not only am I the Grim Reaper of plants, but the cats are jerks and they eat the real ones.)

And, speaking of jerks cats, let’s not forget my most favoritest treasure Schmoo brought with him when he moved in…

Little Zero! Just look at those teeny kitty foots…

Please share this post with your friends who like magically floating shelves and teeny kitty foots. So, like, everyone.

(Shout out to Jaime Kraft, who is the artist behind the framed heart sculpture hanging below our floating(!) shelves.)

*This post contains affiliate links.

Subscribe and I'll love you forever.

Every time you share, an angel gets their wings.


  • Sue

    Any guy who’s a cat guy is OK in my book! My hubby came with 2 cats – package deal. Glad you two get along so well – we are at year 22 married & I have to say, we have so much fun every day! Life is damn good.

    PS – love the shelves!

    • My Crappy House

      He’s a cat guy AND a dog guy. So, one day, we’ll have to get a dog. I’m just not ready for that yet… Dogs are a whole different type of fur kid. Congrats on 22 years! I think the key to a lasting relationship is to have fun. Laugh every day and nothing else matters. Life is damn good!

  • Em

    Those are remarkably tiny cat feet. Does the online feet community accept cat feet photos? Could be a bonus source of income.

    Love the floating shelves, and the courage displayed by drilling into your brick. Most impressive. Also, well accessorized…greatly appreciate Schmoop good fortune on display. Thank you also for the hip lingo I can use with my kids.


    • My Crappy House

      Haha there’s gotta be a place for teeny kitty foots… If there’s not, then there should be. Teeny kitty foots are what the world needs now. (And also love, sweet love. Duh.)

      Don’t trust me on the hip lingo. I don’t know wtf I’m talking about.

  • Joan

    Ok. Weird thing to notice, but it sort of jumped out at me as I scrolled down while reading: Is that a mouse under the chair in the shot showing the empty, installed shelves?? I’m hoping it’s a cat toy, but boy, does it look realistic! LOL Love floating shelves. Love how artfully you’ve put the stuff on the shelves, too. I never have been very good at that…

    • My Crappy House

      Haha good eye! I didn’t notice that was in the picture. False alarm… It is just a cat toy. One of dozens that the cats love to ignore…

      I think the key to a good arrangement is variety; in size, color, and texture. It keeps things interesting.

    • Joan

      Whew! Glad it’s just a cat toy! (I’m not afraid of mice, they’re cute. But, they are disease carriers when wild and do not belong in my house!) I have a hard time even deciding what things look good together. *sigh*

  • Sandra Clark

    Okay, don’t know what to comment on first here, so I’ll start with Zero – so adorable, what a professional, and he looks like he’s so proud of his wall, even though it was Egor all those years ago that did the heavy lifting (all his supervisor and video appearance work). Your brick wall I have always loved, it is actually what brought me to your site in the first place. I still dream about doing this Somewhere in our house Someday. The shelves just make it look like they and the wall went up when your house was built. And you definitely won the lottery with your Schmoopy, he was worth the wait. I really enjoy getting all these notices about new posts from you, it’s like having a birthday every couple of weeks (well, the cake part, not the getting-old part)

    • My Crappy House

      Zero does have his own presence, doesn’t he? I think Egor is happy to have some time off, but I won’t let him retire just yet. The two of them just love the camera. You’d think I pose them, but they just appear when I start taking pictures. Doing their part to make my blog cuter

      I highly recommend installing brick – anywhere! It adds so much to the ambiance. And I agree with you about Schmoo. I totally hit the jackpot. Everyone should be so lucky! Life is good.

    • My Crappy House

      Yeah, I feel you. Egor does too, but it depends on the shape, I think. He leaves these alone, but if I have a spiky fake plant, I’ll be finding little bits of plastic mixed in with his vomit. Cats really are jerks sometimes…

  • Barbara H.

    Teeny little kitty feet – they are super tiny and make him even more special. Always a cat person and always amazed that these small creatures are willing to choose us over the wild.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *