So, you Googled “crappy houses” and you ended up here. Welcome! This is your lucky day for two reasons: First, misery loves company. I am your company. Second, I’m freaking funny and it sounds like you could use a good laugh. I mean, your house is crappy, right? That sucks. Believe me… I know.
This is me. I am a tiny woman with no money. I used to have a little bit of money, but then I bought a crappy house in 2011 and now that money is all gone. What I do have is time. And time is basically “free” so I spend that instead of the money that I don’t have. Since I can’t afford to pay most professionals, I have learned to do a lot of things myself. I’m up at all hours of the night working on various projects to make my crappy house a home. (I do a lot of work in my pajamas…)
I’m really (sort of) enjoying renovating my crappy house and I especially like getting compliments for all of my hard work (from you in particular, stranger), so I thought I’d start a blog to share my DIY adventures with the world. My intent is not to teach you anything (though if you happen to learn something, awesome!), but to have a place to write about my experiences and show off my accomplishments so you can say, “OMG, did you really do that yourself?!” and then I can say, “Yes. I am a badass.”
I used to have my own company, working as a 3D designer, but then there was this global pandemic that ruined everything. I’m not bitter. (Just kidding. Yes, I am.) So, while it used to be a hobby, my blog has now become my new career. It’s a pretty great job, actually. I really like my boss. (It’s me. I’m the boss.) The pay could be better, but I’m hoping to prove my worth to the interwebs and earn a raise in time.
Let’s see. What else… Oh! I have two cats. A gray one named Egor and a black and brown one named Zero. You can follow them here on Instagram. (Yeah, people really do follow cats. Can you believe it?)
They love the camera, so you’ll see them appear in a lot of my photos. You might think I pose them on purpose because it makes good business sense (cats do rule internet), but honestly, they’re both just attention whores.
Speaking of attention whores, I also have a husband (Established: 2020, Code name: Schmoopy), but let’s just leave him out of this. Eyes on me, please. This is my rodeo.
For fun, I am an avid pool player (I’m terrible) and I also have a black belt in jiu jitsu. (Yes, for reals. Don’t mess with me.)
So, that’s about it. Again, welcome to My Crappy House! If this is your first time here, may I suggest you start by taking this tour of My Crappy House? It will give you an idea of just how crappy this house was when I started so you can fully appreciate all I’ve accomplished so far and, thus, be sufficiently amazed at my progress. Maybe you’ll even feel a little bit better about your own crappy house and its potential.
I hope you’ll come back often to marvel at my mad skills and fabulous personality. (If I’ve already won you over, subscribe here to receive a cute, little, unobtrusive, not annoying email whenever I post something new.) Let’s bond over our shared house crappiness.
Fondly, your new BFF (blog friend forever),
P.S. Want to know even more about me? (I get that. I’m an intriguing person…) Click here to listen to a podcast where Doug from Thumb & Hammer and I talk about my crappy house and also how amazing I am.
P.P.S. The cats aren’t the only ones on Instagram. Follow me here. I post stuff on occasion. Not as good as the cat’s stuff, but I try.
P.P.P.S. OMG! Last one. I just wanted you to know you can always contact me directly here. I love email and I answer everyone. (Except jerk spammers.)