• Paint it Gold, Whatever It Is

    June 10, 2021 / 22 Comments
    Feature image close up of skeleton figurine

    The Midas Touch

    Are you sick of hearing about wedding stuff? (Because I am.) This is another one of those projects that, yes, technically was for my wedding day, but can also be for any day. (Like… Tuesday, for example…) You can use this painting technique to elevate the look of figurines or frames or other decorative things. To do this mysterious project yourself, the first thing you’re going to want to do is paint it gold, whatever “it” is.

    Here’s my “thing”…

    1920s full color skeleton figurine

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  • Shop Your Own House

    May 13, 2021 / 17 Comments

    There’s No Place Like Home

    I dreamed of an end table that was smart and courageous with a lot of heart. (Which is a weird list of requirements for an end table, but just go with it.) I searched high and low. Near and far. Had there been a Wizard, I… well, I probably wouldn’t have wasted my one ‘Wizard ask’ on a silly end table, but in the end, it didn’t matter. It was right there with me all along! If I ever go looking for my heart’s desire again, I won’t look any further than my own crappy house. What do you have in your inventory? Shop your own house and see…

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  • Master Bedroom Ideas: Design

    February 1, 2021 / 10 Comments
    Master Bedroom Design Concept

    Middle Bedroom Syndrome

    My master bedroom is the ‘Jan Brady‘ of my crappy house. For the last ten years, it’s been completely ignored. Overlooked. Forgotten. Watching the other two bedrooms get all of the attention while it just sat there, all sad and neglected. I’m sure it has a complex by now and will need lots of therapy. You’ve seen the other two rooms many times. My dressing room (the popular one with all the internet admirers) and my offith (the cute and thmart one) have been featured many times on My Crappy House. I’m thinking it’s finally time to pay some attention to poor ‘Jan’. Let’s talk about my master bedroom ideas!

    (My design ideas, you weirdos. This is not that kind of blog.)

    Master Bedroom Design Concept

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  • How to Make a Kick Ass Bow

    November 23, 2020 / 26 Comments
    how to make a bow

    Holiday Bows, Yo

    At the beginning of September, my local craft store started selling pre-made Christmas bows for fifteen bucks a piece. Now, I ask you: Who is the crazy person spending fifteen bucks on a freaking bow? Is it you? Be honest. This is a safe space. You can tell me. Do your bows look like this?

    bad bow looks like roadkill

    Yeah, OK. I see why you’d drop fifteen bucks on a bow. I mean, that’s pretty pathetic. It’s like ribbon roadkill. I guess you really do suck at making bows. But, don’t despair. I know how to make a kick ass bow and, today, I’m going to show you how to make one too.

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  • Magically Floating Shelves

    September 28, 2020 / 18 Comments

    What Sorcery is This?

    Having been well established in My Crappy House for many years, surrounded by all of my many crappy possessions, you would think that it would have been a challenge making room for Schmoo when he moved in with me. It wasn’t. Lucky for me, he wasn’t attached to much of his stuff. Just his clothes, tools, a few manscaping products, some books, and a handful of treasures.

    This post is about the treasures.

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  • Building a Shadowbox for an Heirloom

    August 23, 2020 / 35 Comments
    Shadowbox for heirloom

    Procrastination is in My Blood.

    You’re in the right place. I’m going to show you how I built a shadowbox for an heirloom, but first, I want to tell you a little bit about my grandma. Please indulge me. She passed away when I was only four years old. I only have fuzzy, unfocused (aka misty, watercolor) memories of her that I’m not even sure are real.

    Me and my grandma on my 4th birthday

    Still, from all I’ve been told, I feel like she and I are kindred spirits. My creativity comes from her, as does my propensity for procrastination…

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  • My Tufted Green Velvet Couch

    November 3, 2015 / 35 Comments

    Sofa, So Good

    I had four months and this crazy idea that I might actually be able to install my floor before my beautiful tufted green velvet couch arrived. I mean… four months. (That’s a third of a year, in case you suck at math.) But four months goes by really quickly. I actually did get some stuff done in that time, but I may have been a bit overly optimistic when I came up with that silly floor idea. (Which is weird, because optimism is totally not my thing.) I promise to fill you guys in on what I’ve accomplished lately, but this post is all about this beauty…

    My Tufted Green Velvet Couch

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