50 Shades of Gray

Life is full of disappointments. For example, if you were excited thinking I actually wrote a post about Fifty Shades of Grey, the movie… well, then there’s one right there. (And, also… Seriously?)

Christian Grey with swatches

Christian Grey intently watches.

With swatches.

Though I have not seen the movie, there’s a decent chance that this post will be better (hahaha… of course it will…) because it isn’t about the (not at all far fetched) 28 year old fantastically handsome billionaire sexual sociopath Christian Grey, but about the color gray. Actually, watching gray paint dry is probably better than the movie. Thus, the bar is set quite low for this post…

Hey, guess what? I love gray! My living room, my office, my bathroom… all shades of gray.

Shades of Gray Swatches One evening, as I sat looking at my new curtains and thinking how awesome they are and what great taste I have, I was bothered by the whiteness of the ceiling and how my pretty crown molding just sort of faded into it. It became quite clear to me that the ceiling should be gray.

Ceiling Before

I stopped at Sherwin Williams and picked up a bunch of gray swatches. And taped them all to my ceiling. And left them there. For like 5 months.

Swatches on Ceiling

I wanted a very light, understated gray. The color I chose is called Rhinestone, which really doesn’t sound understated at all. In fact, it sounds downright bedazzling.

Elvis Paintbrush 2

The lesson here is never judge a color by its name. I’d paint a room Cadaver Gray if it was pretty.

I painted a spot to see how it would look.

Painted Swatch of Rhinestone

At first, I thought it might be too dark. Then I thought no, no… I think maybe it’s too light… Aha! This must be the Goldilocks of gray ceiling colors! I felt confident I had picked a winner.

I know show off seasoned painters cut in freehand, but whatever. I need the tape. I’m not ashamed.

Celing Taped

I put this project off for a long time because I knew it would be a pain in the ass. (That’s a safe bet since pretty much every project is a pain in the ass…) Of course, this one was, but in the end, it was totally wor-

Ceiling After 1

Wait. What? Is this the after? Hmm. OK, well… let’s see… I guess the lighting makes a big difference. By my calculations, when the sun’s position is exactly 62.7 degrees in the sky, on an overcast day, with 36% humidity and an air quality index of 62, and when the pollen count is under 3.4, my ceiling looks quite nice. Totally what I was going for.

Ceiling After 2

Disappointed? Whatever. You spent three minutes reading a blog post. It’s not like you spent a whole weekend working on an invisible project.

Life’s a bitch.

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  • John @ AZ DIY Guy

    I was fairly positive you wouldn’t be writing about the movie, and you did not dissapoint! Even in the photos, the crown seems to pop nicely. Is it a trick of shadows in the photo, or is the ceiling wavy on either side of the window and not touching the crown? Maybe it’s an optical illusion.

    I’m totally in agreement that all painting projects are a pain in the ass.

    • My Crappy House

      You must know me by now… Would I really have gaps between my crown and ceiling? How would I sleep at night? That’s just the shadows thrown by the curtains.

      Painting totally does suck! Unfortunately, I’ve got much more to do… But nothing makes an impact like paint. Or it usually makes an impact. Not quite so much in this case…

  • Elle Gee

    I’m not entirely sure I could enjoy your blog posts more. I promise I snicker out loud every time I read one and my family wants to know what’s so funny! Please keep working your (not-so) crappy house!!

    • My Crappy House

      Thank you! You keep reading, I’ll keep posting. Ever so infrequently, but I promise I will…

  • Lorraine

    I’m not a fan of gray. I don’t even own gray clothes, but I have to say it looks fabulous in your room. I can see the difference even though it’s subtle. The detail in the crown molding does show up a bit more. And I love the brick wall! I’m a new reader and I enjoyed your post. Made me laugh this morning.

    • My Crappy House

      I’m glad you guys can see the difference. It’s oh so subtle… Welcome to my crappy house

  • Sharon Turner

    If you use any more gray paint, you won’t be able to find Egor. He’s beginning to blend in with the décor.

  • dbmojo

    OMG what a timely post! You’ve got the space and the light (lol) for gray. Looks great! Not so much in my dingy NYC apartment with a funky layout (cement gray). I also painted the ceiling (cement) grey, and the place wound up looking like the inside of a submarine.

    Wound up going to WAR with gray – yes the walls were taunting me. Even started painting a wall Orange (Ok, maybe it was the wine…) Finally, one wall ended up Terra Cotta, the adjoining wall is Beach Glass, and next to it is Ashley Gray, which is an awesome color despite it’s name, Lol. And the ceilings are white.

    A bit hard to see the colors in this video, but the orange patch is kinda funny

    Feb 2015 paint video

    • My Crappy House

      Amazing how color changes so dramatically at different times of day. I love the after palette. It looks great!

    • dbmojo

      Why Thanks!

      so TRUE colors can change DRASTICALLY depending on the time of day, curvature of the earth, space-time continuum, what have you.

      You also have to consider what type of artificial light you’ll be using at night, bcs colors change according to bulbs.

      Which falls under your post “One Thing Leads To Another”.

      Can’t paint till lighting is figured out. In this case recessed lights. So I really tried to emulate this blog and bought a book on basic wiring. So I can probably wire a 3-way switch, but unlike you no way I’m gonna bust holes in the walls to run BX cables through the ceiling. BX are those armor plated cables required by city code so the rats can’t chew through them

      So why did it take the Trinidadian electricians 2 months to install 8 lights? I dunno, but every time I came home it smelled like Xmas…

    • My Crappy House

      Apartment life (especially CITY apartment life) is a whole other animal. When you don’t have attic access, the job becomes that much harder. And running BX sounds like a nightmare. Some things are best left to the pros. Gotta know your limits…

    • My Crappy House

      Thanks! I’m not even done with the gray. I might really have fifty shades by the time I’m done…

  • Pat

    Lololol. I really enjoy reading your posts and seeing the progress you are making on your house. Gray is not my favorite color, but seeing your (not crappy anymore) house, I might have to give gray a try. You inspire me to keep working on my really crappy house (sigh – it takes sooo long to get anything done).

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