A long time ago, in a crappy house far, far away, there lived a pale princess named… um… Spackle. Yeah, OK. Princess Spackle. She had to rescue herself from… well, from herself because she’s a dumbass who tore her whole house apart without knowing how to put it all back together again. Princess Spackle may have been naive, but she learned many skills and eventually became a DIY Ninja.
One day, Princess Spackle built a 6 story book house around the doorway to The Kingdom of Office Crap That Must Be Stored For All Eternity. This Kingdom was a relatively organized, yet unsightly realm. Princess Spackle thought about building doors to hide it, but decided that a curtain would look nicer and make office crap retrieval easier.
So, Princess Spackle went shopping. She shopped and shopped and bought many curtains from many stores, but eventually she narrowed her choices down to 5. One of them was a pretty gray curtain with a pretty silver lattice pattern that she liked very much. Princess Spackle was thinking it would make the best choice when suddenly she remembered some beautiful fabric she had purchased the year before that might look even better. She hung it up to take a look.
She immediately loved it and, the very next day, returned all of the curtains she had bought.
But then, a few weeks later, something unexpected happened. Princess Spackle, without any warning at all, abruptly decided (out of nowhere) to make a shower curtain out of the beautiful fabric instead. (Princess Spackle is annoyingly unpredictable.)
Now what would she do to cover the doorway to The Kingdom of Office Crap That Must Be Stored For All Eternity? She started shopping again and bought two more curtains that might work. One of those looked nice enough, so she made up her mind to use it. (As if Princess Spackle ever really makes up her mind. She’s kind of an indecisive pain in the ass, if you want the truth…)
Now Princess Spackle knows people like to follow her DIY Ninja adventures, but she is very lazy and it had been a long time since she’d had any adventures to talk about. So, even though she had already picked a curtain to use, she decided to play a game and ask people which curtain they liked best. She called it a Pointless Poll. Much to her dismay, the one everyone liked the best was the pretty gray curtain with the pretty silver lattice pattern that she had liked too from the very beginning.
Princess Spackle tried to find it again. She searched and searched for the pretty gray curtain with the pretty silver lattice pattern in every store in the land, but she couldn’t find it anywhere.
But then she did find yet another curtain that she liked…
So she bought that one and hung it the hell up.