• My Martha Stewart Sofa | The Saybridge

    The Heat is On!

    OMG, do I suck at making decisions! I agonize over them. Because once I choose something, it’s chosen. I have to live with it. No backsies. It’s ridiculously easy for me to remain stalled in a state of indecision purgatory. It’s sooo comfortable here. I have Netflix and Doritos here. Who needs a kitchen? And as long I remain here, my house is firmly grounded in potential. It could be anything when it grows up. And I can keep hoping it will win a scholarship to pay for it all.My crappy house imagining it was a beautiful Victorian house

    Yeah, right. Keep dreaming, house.

  • How to Make a DIY Shower Curtain

    A Tutorial. Sort of.

    You know I’m not big on tutorials. I normally couldn’t care less about teaching you anything (it’s all about me…) but, because it’s the season of giving, I’ve decided to give you the gift of the DIY shower curtain! Yeah, I did say DIY. You have to make it yourself. Some gift, right? Sorry. No refunds or exchanges…

    Ribbon on an ironing board with scissors

  • A Modern Fairytale

    Once Upon a Curtain

    A long time ago, in a crappy house far, far away, there lived a pale princess named… um… Spackle. Yeah, OK. Princess Spackle. She had to rescue herself from… well, from herself because she’s a dumbass who tore her whole house apart without knowing how to put it all back together again. Princess Spackle may have been naïve, but she learned many skills and eventually became a DIY Ninja.

  • My House is Not a Victorian.

    Well, duh! My house is a crappy ranch. I just want you to be aware that I’m aware that I don’t live here.

    Victorian House

    Oh, if only.

    I could decorate the crap out of that house. I lurve Victorian inspired décor. Curvy legged furniture and tufted velvet… Damask wallpaper and chandeliers… Intricate moulding and millwork… None of which really makes sense in my crappy ranch.