• My Crappy Advice: I Hate My Closet

    Season 1 | Episode 2

    The Features That Make a Closet Great & Designing a Walk-In Closet on a Budget

    Welcome back to My Crappy Advice, where the advice is free and, despite the misleading name, not crappy. Like, at all. (I know. It’s confusing. Just go with it.) This episode is all about closets… tips for closet design, how to redo a closet on a budget, and wtf to do when your attic access is in a stupid spot. If you’ve got a crappy design or DIY dilemma that you’d like my (not) crappy advice on, look for a submission link at the end of this post. In the meantime, if I ‘hate my closet’ is a common thought for you, keep on reading…

    my crappy advice dear crappy

  • Snow Sucks. Rage with Me.

    Snowman with scissors in head cat looking on

    Let’s Kill it with a Chainsaw

    Or with manicure scissors… I have a hate|hate relationship with snow. I mean, I hate snow… but I also hate snow. It’s a fine line between hate and hate. That’s where you’ll find snow. And, also, snow sucks.

    Mini snowman stabbed with mini scissors

  • A DIY Love Story: Installing a Towel Hook For My Honey

    Feature towel hung on bathroom door far away

    Imagine If You Will

    Imagine you’re in the shower. No, no. Don’t look down. Just close your eyes. Ahh. A nice, relaxing, hot shower. Soooo nice. Let your mind wander… Contemplate your place in the universe and why you exist on Earth and what happens when we die and why Paul Rudd hasn’t aged in 25 years and… Whoa. Okay, you’ve spent way too much time in there. You’re getting all pruney. Time to get out. You turn the water off, reach for your towel and…

    Towel hanging on bathroom door so far away

  • Master Bedroom Ideas: Design

    Master Bedroom Design Concept

    Middle Bedroom Syndrome

    My master bedroom is the ‘Jan Brady‘ of my crappy house. For the last ten years, it’s been completely ignored. Overlooked. Forgotten. Watching the other two bedrooms get all of the attention while it just sat there, all sad and neglected. I’m sure it has a complex by now and will need lots of therapy. You’ve seen the other two rooms many times. My dressing room (the popular one with all the internet admirers) and my offith (the cute and thmart one) have been featured many times on My Crappy House. I’m thinking it’s finally time to pay some attention to poor ‘Jan’. Let’s talk about my master bedroom ideas!

    (My design ideas, you weirdos. This is not that kind of blog.)

    Master Bedroom Design Concept

  • Painting White Trim Dark Looks So Good

    Come to The Dark Side

    Do you ever fantasize about painting your boring, white trim a really dark color? I mean, white trim has its place, sure, but sometimes it just feels so… meh. So… ordinary. I don’t know about you, but I prefer extra-ordinary. Actually, scratch the ordinary part. I prefer extra. Painting white trim dark is totally extra. For our purposes, in this post, that’s a good thing.

    Nay, a great  thing.

    Check out the bold, glossy, black trim in my extra dressing room, below. (No, not an extra dressing room. I don’t have two dressing rooms. I’m not a Kardashian. We literally just established what extra means in this post. Try to focus, please.)

    Green and pink dressing room with zebra rug and black painted trim

  • My Crappy Advice: Where Should I Put My Bed?

    Dear Crappy feature image

    Season 1 | Episode 1

    Bed Placement & Curtain Rules to Live By

    This week, I’m very excited to introduce a new regular feature here on the blog that I hope you will enjoy. I’m calling it, My Crappy Advice. (No, of course my advice isn’t crappy at all, it’s fan-freaking-tastic. I’m just very committed to my crappy brand.) I figure it’ll be a monthly post where I offer design advice to my readers. If you’ve got a design dilemma you’d like to submit, look for a link at the end of this post and I’ll see what I can do to help you out. (I’ve got mad skills, you know.) In the meantime, keep reading to find out where the bed should go and how to hang the curtains…

    my crappy advice dear crappy

  • How to Clean a Room When You’re Gross

    Clean kitchen with messy island

    Cleaning Advice From a Certified Slob

    Well, who can believe this? Who do I even think I am, trying to give you tips on cleaning? You guys know I’m a slob. (Remember my office?) While it’s true that I am totally gross, cleaning a room and keeping a room clean are two very different things. I know I’m the last person you would ever expect to get this advice from, but I actually do know how to clean a room really well. I’ve got a method… And, this week, I’m sharing that method with you. You’re welcome.

    How to clean your house before picture

  • Building an Outdoor Cat Shelter, Part III

    building cat shelter feature image

    Won’t you take me to… Crazy Town?

    Why, yes. Yes, of course, I’ll take you to Crazy Town. Let’s go!

    (This post is the last in a multi-part series about building a cat shelter. If you’re just joining me, you’ll want to start here, at the beginning. I promise, it’ll be worth it. I’m an excellent writer.)

    The day has finally come! It’s our last trip to Crazy Town. (For this project, I mean. I go to Crazy Town all the time. I’m a regular. I’ve got a time share. It has a guest room, so you can come too.) Anyway, my outdoor cat shelter is finally done, in all its crazy glory, and I’m here to tell you all about it.

    Right meow.

    Egor lying on back thought bubble

  • Goodbye, 2020.

    Feature Photobomb

    Don’t let the door hit you on the way out…

    Oh, who am I kidding, 2020? I hope the door does hit you on the way out. I hope it hits you really hard, right in the ass, and it’s covered with murder hornets, and COVID, and it opens directly into hell…

    Goodbye 2020 Doorway to Hell