Season 1 | Episode 2
The Features That Make a Closet Great & Designing a Walk-In Closet on a Budget
Welcome back to My Crappy Advice, where the advice is free and, despite the misleading name, not crappy. Like, at all. (I know. It’s confusing. Just go with it.) This episode is all about closets… tips for closet design, how to redo a closet on a budget, and wtf to do when your attic access is in a stupid spot. If you’ve got a crappy design or DIY dilemma that you’d like my (not) crappy advice on, look for a submission link at the end of this post. In the meantime, if I ‘hate my closet’ is a common thought for you, keep on reading…
Let’s Kill it with a Chainsaw
Or with manicure scissors… I have a hate|hate relationship with snow. I mean, I hate snow… but I also hate snow. It’s a fine line between hate and hate. That’s where you’ll find snow. And, also, snow sucks.
Imagine If You Will
Imagine you’re in the shower. No, no. Don’t look down. Just close your eyes. Ahh. A nice, relaxing, hot shower. Soooo nice. Let your mind wander… Contemplate your place in the universe and why you exist on Earth and what happens when we die and why Paul Rudd hasn’t aged in 25 years and… Whoa. Okay, you’ve spent way too much time in there. You’re getting all pruney. Time to get out. You turn the water off, reach for your towel and…
Color Me Inspired!
While scrolling through my Instagram feed recently, I came upon this painting by Rachel Ruysch that is being auctioned off at Sotheby’s. (You know, that fancy auction house for rich folks?) The estimated worth is 1-1.5 million dollars. So, pardon me while I just go get my checkbook…
Middle Bedroom Syndrome
My master bedroom is the ‘Jan Brady‘ of my crappy house. For the last ten years, it’s been completely ignored. Overlooked. Forgotten. Watching the other two bedrooms get all of the attention while it just sat there, all sad and neglected. I’m sure it has a complex by now and will need lots of therapy. You’ve seen the other two rooms many times. My dressing room (the popular one with all the internet admirers) and my offith (the cute and thmart one) have been featured many times on My Crappy House. I’m thinking it’s finally time to pay some attention to poor ‘Jan’. Let’s talk about my master bedroom ideas!
(My design ideas, you weirdos. This is not that kind of blog.)
Come to The Dark Side
Do you ever fantasize about painting your boring, white trim a really dark color? I mean, white trim has its place, sure, but sometimes it just feels so… meh. So… ordinary. I don’t know about you, but I prefer extra-ordinary. Actually, scratch the ordinary part. I prefer extra. Painting white trim dark is totally extra. For our purposes, in this post, that’s a good thing.
Nay, a great thing.
Check out the bold, glossy, black trim in my extra dressing room, below. (No, not an extra dressing room. I don’t have two dressing rooms. I’m not a Kardashian. We literally just established what extra means in this post. Try to focus, please.)
Season 1 | Episode 1
Bed Placement & Curtain Rules to Live By
This week, I’m very excited to introduce a new regular feature here on the blog that I hope you will enjoy. I’m calling it, My Crappy Advice. (No, of course my advice isn’t crappy at all, it’s fan-freaking-tastic. I’m just very committed to my crappy brand.) I figure it’ll be a monthly post where I offer design advice to my readers. If you’ve got a design dilemma you’d like to submit, look for a link at the end of this post and I’ll see what I can do to help you out. (I’ve got mad skills, you know.) In the meantime, keep reading to find out where the bed should go and how to hang the curtains…
Cleaning Advice From a Certified Slob
Well, who can believe this? Who do I even think I am, trying to give you tips on cleaning? You guys know I’m a slob. (Remember my office?) While it’s true that I am totally gross, cleaning a room and keeping a room clean are two very different things. I know I’m the last person you would ever expect to get this advice from, but I actually do know how to clean a room really well. I’ve got a method… And, this week, I’m sharing that method with you. You’re welcome.
Won’t you take me to… Crazy Town?
Why, yes. Yes, of course, I’ll take you to Crazy Town. Let’s go!
(This post is the last in a multi-part series about building a cat shelter. If you’re just joining me, you’ll want to start here, at the beginning. I promise, it’ll be worth it. I’m an excellent writer.)
The day has finally come! It’s our last trip to Crazy Town. (For this project, I mean. I go to Crazy Town all the time. I’m a regular. I’ve got a time share. It has a guest room, so you can come too.) Anyway, my outdoor cat shelter is finally done, in all its crazy glory, and I’m here to tell you all about it.
Don’t let the door hit you on the way out…
Oh, who am I kidding, 2020? I hope the door does hit you on the way out. I hope it hits you really hard, right in the ass, and it’s covered with murder hornets, and COVID, and it opens directly into hell…